Blame It On The Pain Episode 24
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π§ Blame It On The Pain TWENTY FOUR:
βIt wasnβt those boys, Ford. It was DeLuca. I know it was.β
Iβd spent almost 48 hours in the same interrogation room at that point. I fell asleep in Fordβs arms for a few short hours, only to wake up screaming.
I knew the truth. I saw it with my very own eyes. They tried bringing in a child psychiatrist. They tried feeding me.
They tried doing everything they could to get me to believe something that I refused to.
I just didnβt understand why they wanted me to believe otherwise.
Ford dragged a hand through his dark hair. His 5 oβclock shadow looked even more scruffy than usual, not that it dulled his movie star good looks.
Like my father, he was young. Both he and my father were the youngest members of the FBI, still in their late 20βs.
I sat up in my seat, my legs swinging because they didnβt quite reach the floor yet. βWhereβs my mom? Why isnβt she here with me? Especially when Iβm being interrogated. Whereβs my lawyer?β
Ford threw up his hands in frustration. βIβm not interrogating you, Alyssa. I just need you to understand certain things. And you donβt need a lawyer because youβre not in any kind of trouble.β
βThen why am I still stuck here? Whereβs my mother!β I screamed.
Fords expression changed from one of frustration to sheer sadness.
He reached for my hand. βSheβs in the hospital,β he said softly.
βWhy?β
He rubbed his eyes. βSheβs not in good shape right now, kiddo. And the doctorβs need to look after her for another day or so. She knows youβre here, safe with me.β
βWhat happened to her? Give it to me straight, Ford. Iβm a big girl now. Iβm officially 10 years old today.β
A look of pity flashed across his face. βAfter she found out what happened, she collapsed.β He paused, appearing to choose his next words carefully, but I cut right to the chase.
βWhat happened to the baby?β
βShe lost the baby,β he whispered.
I pulled my knees up to my chest and began rocking myself. βItβs my fault. I didnβt want a little sister and now sheβs de.ad. Just like itβs all my fault that my Daddy died.β
Ford immediately stood up, walked over to me and sat me on his lap. βNo, sweetheart. None of this is your fault.β
I sunk against him and put my arms around his neck. βYouβre only saying that because Iβm a kid.β
βHave I ever treated you like a kid, Alyssa?β
I thought about his question for a moment before I answered, βNo.β
He was right. He never treated me like I was a child. He always talked to me like I was his equal. So much so, that he and my mother got into it a few times. Especially after he let it slip that Santa and the Easter Bunny werenβt real, back when I was 8 years old.
I liked that about Ford, though. In a world full of adults trying mold me into what they wanted me to be, he let me decide things for myself. He let me draw my own conclusions after give me the cold-hard facts.
He never told me I shouldnβt do something, or told me I was wrong for feeling a certain wayβ¦until now.
βAnd you trust me, right?β he asked.
βYouβre the only one I have left now. Of course, I trust you.β
He turned us in the seat Adve up on the table. βThen I need you to repeat after me- I saw those two boys ki ll my father after he broke up a fight brewing between them and a few others.β
βBut I didnβt, Ford. I know exactly who ki lled my father. Iβll never forget his face. I see it every time I close my eyes. It was him. That DeLuca, man. I donβt know why you donβt believe me. Ask Hannah, sheβll tell you.β
βGoddmmit,β he barked. βListen to me, Alyssa. DeLuca didnβt ki ll your dad. It was two members of rival gangs. He tried to break it up and he got caught in the crossfire. He was at the wrong place at the wrong time.β
I shook my head adamantly. βNo, it wasnβt. Ask Hannah! Why wonβt you believe me?β
He stood up and kicked a chair across the room.
I began trembling. βAsk Hannah,β I repeated.
He ran back over to me and grabbed my face between his large hands. βI canβt ask Hannah.β
I was even more confused by his statement. βWhy?β
βBecause Hannahβs dead. She was found by her car after leaving the station with two buIIets in her h ead.β
TO BE CONTINUED